Best Mother’s Day Ever
Wonderfully difficult. Motherhood, from its inception, is beautiful and it’s painful. Whether you watched your body grow and change as you heaved at the smell or taste of food, or you awaited painful months of separation while the adoption process became finalized… motherhood is wonderfully difficult.
I now have young adult children. Amazing people- Jacob (whom I affectionately call Jake) and Jordan. I am so dang proud of these two. And they are coming into their own. This season, although joyous, is mixed with a measure of pain, because things will not remain as they always have been. Jordan gets that, and being the sentimental woman she is, she calls it “weird.” She would rather not have this change that demands her growing up, but she relents and embraces it well. She forces herself to grow in independence. Have I mentioned how proud I am of her?
And, Jacob. He’s always been ready to grow up. My most favorite example of this is a quote from his childhood… opening up a holiday card with a small monetary gift from his grandmother, he was obviously disgusted by the gesture, and when asked why, the usually gentle eight- year old said, “I’m old enough to earn my own money!”
Maybe, like I experienced yesterday, Mother’s Day brought with it questions of your effectiveness in mothering. Did you feel some guilt concerning the shortcomings you are well aware of? I did. I honestly needed some healing, and the good Father in heaven knows just how to nurture my doubting heart. So my best Mother’s Day ever started and finished as follows:
The time in His Presence in the early morning hours… there’s no match to hearing God speak intimately to me. He gently addresses my concerns with truth. I can handle hearing the hard things from my God- He speaks what needs to be spoken not to wound me but to heal me.
My hubby met me in the bathroom as I was getting ready for church. He smiled ear-to-ear and eagerly awaited my opening and reading his Mother’s Day card, lovingly addressed to “Nay-Nay.” It was totally in Spanish with a fun recording in Spanish. He was so happy and pleased with his cleverness. Sweet! And I couldn’t miss the postscript: “You couldn’t have done it without me!”
Corporate worship service. Pastor Karen brought the Word of God with an urgent plea to be free in worship- privately and corporately. “You were made to worship Him!” Thank you, dear friend, for sharing your heart for worship and inviting us to go deeper as a body. There’s more for us indeed!
A sail on the York River with family and friends. After what seemed to be endless days of rain and chilly temperatures, the sun reappeared and welcomed us out to the beach and into a wind-driven adventure. I have to agree with songwriter, Jon Foreman: saltwater heals.
Twelve of us jumped into cars and left the madness of the waterfront to head to a quiet spot for dinner. We filled our bellies and filled the atmosphere with shared joy of fellowship. From there, no plans were set. This is where spontaneity takes over and the wonder of God’s goodness becomes increasingly evident…
Most went in separate directions, but Jordan, Michael, Sarah, and I headed to Sarah’s workplace in Colonial Williamsburg. In the past I’ve only walked past Kilwin’s on Prince George Street and smelled the delectable air, but yesterday we indulged! Everything chocolaty exists at Kilwin’s and I opted for the Cappuccino Crunch Hot Fudge sundae. We hung around outside, walked and talked a bit, watched a duck beg for sweet morsels, caught a glimpse of local but world renown musician, Bruce Hornsby, and just enjoyed our amazing desserts.
And then there were two. Jordan and I decided to take full advantage of the warm evening air to walk through Colonial Williamsburg. We took the scenic route around the Governor’s Palace and simply enjoyed the peaceful sounds of birdsongs.
By time we returned home, I was satisfyingly tired and ready to call it a day. But the Lord had more in store- the best part, really. Tucked in bed and ready to let fatigue win, I was surprised by a visit. In came Jordan, Jake and Hannah, Jacob’s fiancé. Jordan had already presented me with a beautiful wooden serving tray earlier in the day, but Jake and Hannah had a basket of gifts they wanted me to open. So many wonderful and thoughtful things. But his card… apparently he cried when he wrote it, and I’m crying now as I think upon his words. That young man graced me with honor, and erased my questions and doubts. How specifically the Lord heals!
Isn’t it a deep need that all of us women have? We need to know that we have value- that what we bring to this world is not only beauty but substance. God knew I needed it; He knew that I was prepared to allow nagging thoughts to go unchecked, but He brought them to light through the sincerity of my son’s expression.
But it gets even better! As I tiredly remained nestled under my covers, my three children sat at the end of the bed and rehashed fun memories of childhood. I listened, smiled, giggled, and blinked heavy eyelids…
I’m entering into a new season of motherhood, but I’m full of goodness from the previous one. Thank you, Father, for the undeserving honor of being a mother. I haven’t done it all just right, but Your grace far exceeds my limitations. If I’m a good mother, and my kids assure me that I am, I owe it all to You. And to my husband!